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Thursday, April 12, 2007
- nothing else matters -

i've never felt like no matter how hard i try to explain it just doesn't work... the other just doesn't listens out... i've never felt like words can be so harshly said... and they mean it everything everyway... i've never felt like people could behave in such ways, tat they just hurt u like nobody's business... i've never felt like, cries are so swallowed... i've never felt like, words are so impactful tat the shock seriously takes a while to come to you... i've never felt like, someone could turn into a total different person...people close to you... yes perhaps once, in secondary school... but tats a horrible experience... and i never want to feel that way again...

how could it be? how could words simply lose their total meaning in trying to express themselves? how come two people whose hearts are supposed to be closely tied together, yet dey gone hay-wired overnight.... how come? no matter how hard i tried to explain, it jus doesn't help... how come... how come...

issit jus me... issit reali me who doesn't understand? how come? i reali tried very hard... i reali tried so hard... but why issit that things just turn out the way i want them to... why issit sth that i strive so hard for, and whn i finally got it, things just start to slip away... and why den did i cried so hard for it in the past... why...

i've never NOT admitted that i was wrong... but, i just wanted to say its not that totally right either... not in the bad or harsh sense but its jus tat things aren't like people think... and i merely wan to keep my lil' principle in mind... in practice... tats all.. i haf no other meaning... but i've no way of explaining at all...

everyone's hurt.. i'm hurt too. but i noe its not lesser for others.. but its neither lesser for mi.. xin jie.. thrs' lots... a lot a lot...but all i noe, is i'm so wrong... i'm so so wrong... and its all my fault... i'm reali tired... for the first time... i dunno how to solve things... i dunno how else can solve things... i dunno.. why am i so bad... am i ...

                                                                                                          
                                                                                                             Written @ 2:10 AM
When leaves fall the coming of Winter arrives
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