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goals.. goal-less?
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Tuesday, October 07, 2008
ever felt like you don't know what's your goal in life? i'm feeling that right now.

having my 2 days of break because of forced leave and i totally hate the policies and structure. it's really making me irritated. today's tuesday. tomorrow and thursday will be going back to office to do my planned wbl. and friday? taking leave. just because we're unassigned for one week.

speaking about goals, i am seriously still stuck at the stage where i'm neither detach from school nor attach to work. i have many things i like to do, and i just feel like doing things i'm happy doing. but whether to turn them into career is another.. wake up your mind jasmine.. reality is always harsh...

i know i'm whinning here yet it doesn't nothing to help what state i'm in now. but i guess i just need to whin it all out.. would someone please unwind me.. perhaps that time of the month is coming.. thats why i'm feeling a little emo.. thinking my life is so screwed up.. i'm becoming a money slave..but till date i am still not able to see the light in this working environment. yeah a beautiful and new office, a pantry that provides my favourite milo but all these just don't seem to make me grow and learn as a person, i don't feel happy at all. it's just about the money.

sometimes how i wish i can get married earlier and stay home to be a tai tai.. ok fine.. a housewife would be good too. but do i really want that? having my brain degenerating overtime, feeling lost touch with the world, not using my brain for a long time..oh no i can't imagine that either... i would need to do something.. and not just stay at home to rot and do housework.. perhaps when i really find what i like to do as a career, i wouldn't mind anything.

haiz. i'm going tuition soon. helping my lil' cousin out with his o'levels chem practical which is this coming thursday.. i'm feeling so gan chiong for him lor, yet he's like still happy-go-lucky. u knw what, i was thinking if i can become a chemistry teacher.. haha.. but i guess i'll be worrying all the time for my kids... of course i hope i'm not just having that 3-minute flush..

siannnn..... tell me what's my ren sheng mu biao.. i wana earn money for myself, my parents, my future. but i dun wana do something i dun feel happy or excited about.. tell me its just temporary.. tell me it will just get better.

                                                                                                          
                                                                                                             Written @ 8:40 AM
When leaves fall the coming of Winter arrives
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